Not every week can be a week of relaxing on the beach even though we know how well that can recharge our batteries. And self-care is more than “me time” and an occasional massage. One way I sometimes help people think about self-care is by breaking it into three types: breathers, sustainers, and restorers. I find it a simple but helpful framework that can make self-care feel more practical and flexible.
Why is Self-Care Important
Self-care has become such an overused term these days that it is easy to dismiss with a roll of the eyes, so it is worth reminding ourselves of why it really is important.
Self-care is the practice of taking care of our own mental, physical and spiritual health – in fact every area of our wellbeing. It helps us to:
- live longer and with greater vitality
- be happier and more content
- increase resilience and our ability to cope with what life throws at us
- reduce stress and anxiety, and regulate our nervous system
- have better relationships
- be more effective in our work and play.
Even so, self-care is often the first thing to drop off our busy schedules, especially if we are juggling many roles and have caring responsibilities. By using the framework of breathers, sustainers, and restorers, I hope you’ll see that doing a little often with some bigger things thrown in occasionally can make self-care something that you can make a routine part of your life.
What Are Breathers, Sustainers, and Restorers?
This model of self-care is a helpful way to understand the various ways in which you can support your own wellbeing. It breaks self-care down into three categories:
1. Breathers: Small pauses throughout the day
Breathers are quick, accessible self-care actions that provide immediate relief or calm. They’re ideal for a quick reset, to regulate energy, stress, anxiety, and emotional overwhelm in real time.
Examples of “breathers” are:
- A few deep breaths with your eyes closed
- Stepping outside for a couple of minutes in nature
- Listening to a favourite song
- A few gentle stretches
- A mindful cup of tea
2. Sustainers: Simple practices that keep you going
Sustainers are consistent practices that help maintain emotional and physical wellbeing over time. They are foundational practices that help keep our “Window of Tolerance” open.
Sustainers might be:
- Eating nourishing food
- Getting good sleep
- Taking a daily walk
- Daily grounding time in nature
- Gratitude journaling for 10 minutes before bed
- Spending time with good friends
- Engaging in a hobby, such as drawing
- Regular therapy
3. Restorers: The deep recharge
Restorers are the experiences that truly refill your cup. They allow you to exhale fully, slow down deeply, and reconnect with what matters most to you. They often require more intention or planning so will happen less often.
Things such as:
- A full afternoon of solitude engaged in meaningful activity
- Participating in a creative workshop
- Extended time in nature, such as a hiking or camping trip
- Immersion in a creative activity that brings about a “flow” state
- Trips away and holidays
- Meditation retreats
Over to you…
Okay, now you have a few ideas for each of breathers, sustainers and restorers, it is time to create your own self-care menu. Download the Self-Care Planner by clicking the button below, and make a list of the things you would enjoy in each category – aim for 7-10 in each column. Note that I said “enjoy”. This is not supposed to be another list of “shoulds”. Focus on what feels truly nourishing for you.
Then, I want you to take action. Set a daily reminder to take a breather, make a plan to implement one sustainer, and put a restorer on your calendar.
Keep your Self-Care Plan somewhere handy where you will see it and be reminded to make YOU and your wellbeing a priority.